Yes, there is someone out there who won’t be in line for the iPhone on Friday. Here are my top seven reasons why:

• AT&T’s Data Network. No matter how you slice it - lame.
• $600 For A Phone Plus Two Year Commitment to AT&T. Even if they did upgrade their network a) the iPhone can’t handle it and b) you’d be locked into their lousy data network plan for two years.
• Price. For $28 more, I could buy a shuffle, a new iPod and an Apple TV.
• Everybody Else. Can you imagine the fire sales all the other guys are going to have when that start believing the hype? They’ll be giving phones away for free soon.
• v1. This bad boy will have problems. v1s always do. I can only imagine hearing those words “we’ll get your repaired iPhone out to you in 4 to 6 weeks.
• Do I Really Want To Be Online 24×7? After the 4 Hour Workweek, I’ve actually be pondering my first non-Internet connected cell phone in like 7 years.
• Ratatouille Opens On Friday Too!. Shorter line, better snacks, my kids can come and Steve Jobs still makes money off of me.

It’s gonna be a wacky week.

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